Tuesday, September 19, 2006

I'm Not Mrs Tan

My friend calls me a grumpy old woman because, according to her, I complain too much. Small little things also bother me, she says. Take for example, I get annoyed whenever I’m addressed as Mrs Tan.

My surname is Tan. And each time when I am required to present my identification card for whatever purposes, the moron, after doing the necessary, will return my ID card with a “Thank you, Mrs Tan.” . And many times too, I have received calls from banks and other companies asking to speak to Mrs Tan. I would normally correct them and tell them I prefer to be addressed as Ms Tan. But before you could even count to three, the fella would be ending his every statement with a “Yes, Mrs Tan/No, Mrs Tan/bla, bla, bla….Mrs Tan/tatadidadaa…….Mrs Tan”. What ‘s wrong with them, huh?

OK, let’s do some exercises :-

Ms Tan married Mr Wong – That will be Mrs Wong or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan

Ms Tan married Encik Ali bin Abu - That will be Mrs Ali or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan

Ms Tan married Mr Mutu A/L Samy – That will be Mrs Mutu or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan

Ms Tan married Mr Joe White – That will be Mrs White or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan

Is that all so confusing that they just cannot figure it out what is the correct salutation? In fact, how they came to the assumption that I’m married and therefore I qualify for the title ‘Mrs’ is beyond me. And this afternoon, I heard some quick footsteps from behind and a shrill voice calling out for a Mrs Tan. Of course, I just continued walking la. How would I know it was someone from the travel agency chasing after me to pass me the passport cover? I’m not Mrs Tan., right?

Sheeessh…. And I’m not even going into those titles like ‘Dato’/Tan Sri/Tun, etc…..’. – this I’ll rant only when I am ‘awarded’ someday, and bless that sod who dare to run after me calling out, “Hello, Hello, Eskew me, Mrs Tan ah”
posted by nyonyapenang at 12:15 AM, |


  At 12:46 AM Blogger Chen said:
no wonder u complain & get annoyed lah.. dia orang tu, pandai-pandai pergi tukar nama orang..
  At 1:12 AM Blogger Bernard said:
These are the people who were never exposed to anyone called by their husband's name. So, they are ignorant that "Mrs" is followed by the woman's married name. Definitely, they won't know what "nee" means either.
  At 5:33 AM Anonymous Erika said:
They must have assume that you change your name to follow ur husband surname ah?

"Ms Tan married Encik Ali bin Abu - That will be Mrs Ali or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan"..

Why Mrs Ali? Not Mrs Abu?
  At 5:34 AM Anonymous Erika said:
They must have assume that you change your name to follow ur husband surname ah?

"Ms Tan married Encik Ali bin Abu - That will be Mrs Ali or Ms/Mdm/Puan Tan"..

Why Mrs Ali? Not Mrs Abu?
  At 7:53 AM Blogger savante said:
Tell them to call you madam lah. Or even better nyonya! :)
  At 8:28 AM Blogger ah nel said:
a bit deepmologis for me low skool kid to understand... ;)

btw when ppl calling me tauke or any name i dont like i just walk and when they say i'm snobbish nvr greet them i told them thats not my name how i noe u calling me... ;)
Agreed and the confusion usually happens to non-chinese as they are not used to surnames.
dr chen,
dia orang semua locals - would expect them to understand better.

talking about that, i cam across someone asking how to pronounce the name '@'. LOL

many locals retain maiden name as 'official names', i.e. for all official documents.
Abu is Ali's father. So you can't address the lady as Mrs Abu.

'nyonya' is reserved for blogger frens only.

ah nel,
what about 'lengchai' and 'handsome'or 'en tau ba'? am sure you'll respond to that. LOL

these are all simple and basic things only. lidat pun conpiused.
  At 9:30 AM Anonymous Jemima said:
Some women have joint surnames after theyare married like "Tan-Wong".

Just tell them to call you "Kakak Nyonya". :)
liddat oso can..i for one DO NOT like to be addressed as MRS lor..especially when they call me MRS G which is my hubby's sirname..like calling my mother in law liddat!
  At 10:41 AM Anonymous suituapui said:
In BM, it's Puan, no difference between Mrs and Madam, that's why! Can't beat my students! Asked them to call me, Mr. STP...or just simply, sir! Then, they'd go and call me Sir STP! Step aside, Sir Elton John!!!
  At 11:00 AM Blogger JoMel said:
I think you should do them a favour by giving them a mini lesson on this. There are a lot of confused people out there. I think I still look unmarried lah. Everywhere I go, ppl call me Miss, and Ah Moi.
  At 12:05 PM Blogger Kenny Ng said:
chinese r really pantang ppl simply change our sur name. some of my colleagues always call wrong my sur name. I just made dunno n just walk off. I'm very frus they always wrote my name wrongly too.
"...bless that sod who dare to run after me calling out, “Hello, Hello, Eskew me, Mrs Tan ah”

"What you say!!?? Mrs Tan??!!! Tan Sri Nyonya ok! (But I think Datin Seri is more appropriate and its probably coming up...!)
  At 1:07 PM Blogger AceOne said:
Halo Ms Tan. I addressed you Ms Tan, Chun anot?? kekekeke..
  At 5:05 PM Blogger sming said:
*nod nod*
Coincidently, my surname is also Tan. And I used to have this vendor who will call me and say "Hello Mrs Tan!".
I will get irritated and tell him " That is my mother lar. You wanna talk to her ??"
  At 5:44 PM Blogger ah nel said:
someone call that before but i didnt entertain them as i'm not wat they call... ;)
joint-surnames too complicated for me. ;)

own name is the sweetest, don't you think so?

SIR suituapui,
hormat! hormat!

you sure do look like a lenglui Ms.

alot of gweilos dunno how to pronounce the surname 'NG'. My fren ended up being called 'ANGIE'.

las montanas,
i'll settle for a simple 'Ms Tan'.

yes, yes, you calling me ah?

some of them really confused - like how come your whole family answers to the name 'Tan'.
betul, khi si lang! LOL

ah nel,
so if call 'taikor' can or not? LOL
  At 8:51 PM Blogger Helen said:
Miss Tan...

Seriously, for me, I don't care what age is the lady.. 'Miss' never fails. Not auntie, Mrs, Madam and whatever. When will they learn hor? lol
  At 9:45 PM Blogger Kenny Ng said:
nonyapenang: yah, u r right... that's y I have to come out with 'Kenny' this name, it's not for sound glamour but it's for easy to call.
couldn't agree more.
not that difficult to understand and practice simple courtesies, right? ;)
  At 11:29 PM Blogger u-jean said:
what happens to you happens to my mum too. when she gets calls from people asking for mrs O (her maiden surname) instead of mrs C, she just tells the person, "wrong number", and then hangs up.
  At 11:34 PM Blogger u-jean said:
at least you have a surname that's easy for people to prononce. not many people can pronounce my surname, ch'ng, correctly. i get like, "ching", "chong", "chung", "cheng", "charng", etc...
hi u-jean, welcome!
hahaha....your mom too? i thot i'm the only one who is annoyed by this 'small stuff' as my frens refer to it.

as for your surname, nobody taught them in school how to pronounce an apostrophe. so tembak saja la. LOL
  At 3:33 AM Blogger ikanbilis said:
i wonder if one day, let say lah you get Tan Sri, will it really be Tan Sri Tan *giggles*
eg. Tan Sri Tan Bay Tan. LOL
  At 10:14 AM Blogger ah nel said:
definately no hiu if got that name... ;P
Oops! Wrong blog..! My apologies Mrs. Tan.
cocka doodle,
nevermind, i'll re-direct you to my mother. ;)