Monday, September 17, 2007

Man Are Born Good

I had just alighted from my car and was walking towards the parking ticket machine when I saw this man, gingerly pushing his trusty bicycle with a plastic pail of clean water on the metal carrier and another 2 smaller pails hanging on either side. In front, was a basketful of assorted plastic bottles of car shampoos, cleaners and whatnots. He approached me and asked if I would like to have my car washed. I asked how much and he replied RM5. I glanced at my car…it sure could do with a good wash. I then dug into my purse and paid him the RM5 and told him I had just put the parking ticket for an hour and that he should get the job done by then.




I hurried off …walked across the road to my client’s place another block away. From across the road, I turned back to look at him and saw him pushing his bicycle down the corner, away from where my car was parked. Aiksss…..What was he up to? Have I been taken for a ride? Did he take my money and then trying to scoot away without doing his work? I was so tempted to turn back and run after him but then, I told myself, Nah…have some faith. Expect him to be honest and know to keep to his side of the deal and to deliver what he had promised.”


Then another voice…a cynical one, reminded me, “Hey…how many times have you been conned into parting with your money under similar instances? And each time, you said that will be the last, and you will trust no one, remember? Will you ever learn?”


Oh, at that very moment, I felt so gullible and kinda upset with myself and I could almost feel my temperature rising already and really, I just wanted to turn on my heels and go get that fella. BUT I chose to HAVE FAITH, and to TRUST HIM. Ahhh....a good feeling came over me and I went on my merry way.


After my appointment and as I was walking back to my car, I told myself to expect to see a clean car and I was not disappointed. He did a much better job than I could do myself….the car was gleaming under the sun. I trusted him and he did not fail me. And to have even entertained the thought that he might have scuttled off with my money, I felt so small…I felt so ashamed.


It was a good day – my faith restored ...
'Man Are Born Good.only challenging circumstances made him otherwise..’

 
posted by nyonyapenang at 12:30 AM, |

54 Comments:

Yes, everyone's born with a clean slate, and a good base. Sometimes we all get lost, and lose our way and faith, but deep down inside, we all want to be good !
  At 7:31 AM Blogger U.Lee said:
Hi Nyonya, read your this post, and out of curiousity have two questions, 1/ How did you know his pail had 'clean water'? You looked?
2/ How did he manage to wash your car with just one pail of water?
And one more, did he ask 'cash in advance'?
By the way, the authorities allow cars to be washed on the street?
Keep well, Nyonya. UL.
  At 9:53 AM Anonymous suituapui said:
Of course! See...I'm so good! LOL!
  At 11:07 AM Anonymous JL said:
It's hard to look at the good side of people when life has thrown all sorts of ugly stuffs at us but i'm glad you did. :)

the always inspiring Kak Nyonya :)
its a blessing to be able to give. Each time u give, something will be return in kind :)

hv a great week nyonyapenang!
  At 12:56 PM Blogger Sasha said:
nyonya, its not your fault. Cos too many bad things happened in this society, so we just expect the worst.
  At 2:14 PM Anonymous mott said:
Sigh..Uncle Lee.

Car clean ok already la. You can wash car with one pail of water..if you're careful!

Australia has idiots hanging around traffic lights, waiting to 'wash' your windscreen..with their squeedgees...irritates the hell outta me..esp when I DON"T WANT THEM TO WASH IT! I'm actually forced to give them money!

Anyway, if you gave money n he didn't wash..it's also ok la. Ur heart was in the right place!
Hi,
We are always suspicious of others. Partly because we have been cheated by others or heard stories from others who got cheated.
  At 7:40 PM Blogger William said:
It's not a sin to be "on your toes".
  At 7:58 PM Blogger ehon said:
i love this post! :D yeah, i believe that people are generally born to be good, but circumstances sometimes make them otherwise. it's so heartwarming. well done, nyonya! :D
  At 9:00 PM Anonymous kat said:
I know what you mean. Many a times I have felt my blood boil at being taken for a ride. Then I realised the money is not worth getting myself all riled up. I'd rather forsake the money than to let it eat me up inside. Just like if I lend someone money, I do not expect to get it back. I'd rather give it away, than to get into an argument over money.

In your case, I think this guy is doing a lot better than other people. At least he is working hard for his money (not easy to earn a living walking in the hot sun and getting dirty looks from people when he approach them..) and not depending on handouts or turning to crime.

What goes around comes around, nyonya. :) See? You have a clean car now!
  At 10:12 PM Blogger Chen said:
i know what u mean. Well, i do agree everyone is born with a good nature but many tends to go astray along the journey, especially if they are under influence.
  At 10:24 PM Blogger U.Lee said:
Hello Nyonya, I rent space abit here reply to Mott in Australia.
Hi Mott, we too had those squeegee people here, same thing, at traffic lights. But due to public complaints as well some drivers took out their guns threatened them, the cops now stop these nonsense. Also these guys were drug addicts.
Re washing car with one pail...for me I want to rinse off the dust and dirt off first with a hose or else kena scratches. I'm quite fussy where my car is concerned, ha ha. Best regards to you, Mott. UL.
  At 12:31 AM Blogger JoMel said:
Nyonya, I know how you feel. Cynicism grows the older we get. No more gullible, no more trusting. But once in a while, someone comes along and soften those hardened parts in our heart and make us believe in good once again. Until another someone comes along and harden it yet again. A vicious cycle. :)
  At 4:23 AM Blogger FireHorse said:
That is what I truly believe Nyonya and dat is why no matter how many times kena con liao, I will keep having faith that "man are born good"
  At 5:56 AM Blogger PEARLY said:
reading you post half way I have a same thougth of you thinking ....oh no ... why she don't pay him when she back to collent the car he will have wait .... well I should ashame myself too .. may be I have been con too many time ahh sori .
but then you are right can't one stick kill the whole boot people right some people are gud . I learn from you again
  At 6:58 AM Blogger Pi Bani said:
I've never used the services of the cuci kereta guys before. I prefer to wash my own car... at least I get the much needed exercise.

But anyway, you're right. Circumstances have turned man from good to bad. That's why to me, before we judge a person, we need to know some background info about them - why they what they do is usually related to their background. Oh well, at least with the kind of voluntary work I'm doing, I do have to find out the background info of the people I'm dealing with!
  At 11:44 AM Blogger J.T. said:
Hi Nyonya

I agree, man is born good... only challenging circumstances made him otherwise.

When someone has been "bitten" too many times, that person begins to mistrust his/her own judgment. If one finds it hard to trust oneself, it is difficult to learn to trust another. It is not necessarily a bad thing. Learning to let go and start trusting oneself will eventually lead to trusting the next person. Lessons in life will probably teach us to identify those who may have hidden agendas ... sometimes after several lessons. That is just my observation, anyway, from personal experience.

I am glad you gave him a chance and let him do what he was supposed to do. If he was questioned, he would have felt mistrusted. This way, you gave yourself and him the gift of trust. :)
  At 2:56 PM Blogger H.C. Tan said:
awww..yalo sometimes we also feel ashamed when we midjudged a person. I think small things like this, esp having faith and the other person delivers really can make your day..

and only RM5 le..where to find in KL?

I had my car washed last week..I had to rush to watch my canto drama, so I left my car and car keys with the indian uncle and told him i'll come back later..a nagging noise inside my head told me not to leave my car just like that, but i did. luckily the fella trustworthy..if not hilang d my car..
I'm glad you chose to have faith. I wonder if I myself would have gone down that same path you did.

My apartment has one of these car-cleaning guys. He has since expanded his business to having a few *associates* now. hehe... and yes, they do a fantastic job.
  At 6:29 PM Blogger savante said:
Always nice to have your faith in humanity restored. Go tip the fella.
Hi Moz Monster,
True...we do get side-tracked or knocked off the rails once a while but all is not lost if we know how to jump back into the line again.

Have a nice day.
just to leave a kiss and a paw print to say that i came here twice today, but my brain's too fried to absorb a thing. and knowing this is an interesting post, i shall savour it when i have a charge of battery. *love ya*
..crawls out of your blog
Hi Uncle Lee,
1) I saw him collecting clean water from hose extended out from one of the shops and I guess he paid the shopowner for the water.

2) I did not see how he did the washing but I think he used water from the other 2 pails too.

3) He did not ask for cash in advance - I paid him upfront so that he need not wait for me and he can proceed to do his other washes after he is done with my car.

4) I am not too sure of the authorities' stand on road-side carwash...eeee....Now that you mentioned, will I be hauled up for abetment? eee....takutsss....

You have a nice day, Uncle Lee.
Hi Suituapui,
Agree with you 120%!
Hi jl,
I know...we are only human and because we are human, we learn empathy, we learn compassion and we learn to see the good over the bad.

Thank you for your kind words. You always inspire me too....you have a good head on your shoulders and you are a very talented and well-adjusted young man.

Have a nice day.
Hi Winniethepooh,
I always believe in that...give...and give and give summore BUT then once a while, I'd kinda feel being taken for a 'lulu' and then I'd feel lousy.
Well, I'd then remind myself...yes, I am blessed to be able to give.
LOVE Is Not LOVE Until IT Is Given Away.

Have a great week, Winniethe pooh.
Hi Sasha,
I guess when we kena ketuk once too often, we built a hard shell supposedly to 'protect' ourselves.
And I guess I have to learn to see the good over the bad.

Have a nice day.
Hi Mott,
hehehee.....I did not actually see how he did the washing but as I said, I expected him to know his job and not to 'con' me.

To earn an honest living is a good feeling and I believe all of us want that.

You have a nice day!
Hi Aiyah Nonya,
We are bombarded with too much negativity...just read the daily newspapers..who kena con, who pulled a fast one, etc....and we begin to build a shell and we become hardened.

I have read many stories of abused children and adults...they did all the 'wrong' things possible and somewhere along the way, somebody opened another door for them..saw their faults BUT highlighted their goodness and they eventually turn around. Bless them all.

I am learning too....I try to see the good more and I expect it...and have faith...the good will come.

Have a great day.
Hi William,
We are only human....we turn on our defences at the slightest indication of a possible 'threat'.

Have a great day.
Hi Ehon,
We chose to see the good and we will feel good and I WANT to feel good. That's why when I decided to trust that car-wash man, I 'threw' out the 'negativity' from my heart and I walk away happier.

Thanks so much for your kind words. You have a pleasant holiday.
Hi Kat,
That's only a natural reaction but we must remember not to let it 'eat' into us and spoil everything for us.
I get angry, I rant and rave and then I throw it out of my system...out and away!

Fully agree with you - no point getting riled up all because of money. And talking about lending money, my poppa taught me long, long time ago, "LEND ONLY IF YOU CAN AFFORD NOT TO HAVE IT BACK.".

Ya, this car-wash fella, he is earning a decent and honest income and that's hard work for him too. I respect him for that.

The car WAS clean that day; now, it needs another wash already. :D

You have a great day, Kat.
Hi Dr Chen,
All of us are born 'clean'...just like a white sheet of paper and along the way, we can find beautiful 'writings' and 'prose' and we can also find 'fowl scratches' and 'doodles'. Hopefully, the good is more than the not-so-good.

A nice day to you, Dr Chen.
Hi Uncle Lee,
Free space for you, anytime! :)
Hi Jomel,
We hope and pray we meet more people who can help us to 'soften'....'soak us in their warmth and rub the callouses away'.

You have a nice day too, Jomel.
Hi Firehorse,
Faith will pull us through....we believe and trust that ya, the next one and, the next one will be the good that we seek. I will surely come....I know it will.

Have a great day,
Hi Pearly,
We have our bad experiences and yes, we get all unhappy and upset BUT I learn to get over it fast and yes, don't use one stick to kill everybody. I like your views, Pearly.

Have a cheerful day.
Hi Pi Bani,
Aiyah....cuci pinggan, cuci rumah, basuh kain, gua boleh....but I take a pass at cuci kereta. heheheh....

Past bad experiences somehow do determine how we react but I have learned to look and see deeper into a situation and hope to see the positives more than the negatives.

You have a super-duper day.
Hi j.t.,
You said it so well, "Learning to let go and start trusting oneself will eventually lead to trusting the next person."

'Be careful of what you want...it may just come true.'....Seek the 'good' and you shall find it.

Have a pleasant day.
Hi H.C. Tan,
When we feel suspicious or feel threatened, our defences kicked into place and sometimes it can be mentally damaging. Spare a little time and re-look and we may see a totally different picture.

I usually have my car washed by the operator at office building and I leave my keys with him too. So far, no complains.

Thanks for dropping by and feel free to do so anytime. You have a great day.
Hi Giddy Tiger,
Sometimes, its just blind faith. hahahah... Close the eyes and hope for the best.

Wah...the operator down at your apartment...his business is booming and this sure speak volumes for him.

Have a great day.
Hi Savante,
I actually wanted to but when I got back to the car, my phone was rang and I was busy yakking and I forgot about him. :P
Hi Mistipurple,
I will not wipe away your kiss and the paw print. Come back anytime, when you are available. **hugsssss** and hang loose!

Have a nice day.
  At 2:55 AM Blogger Kenny Ng said:
Am I one of the man in this category? Haha
Hi Kenny,
Yes, you are a GOOD MAN.

Have a great day.
  At 9:41 PM Blogger Jonzz said:
Haiz, I think you shouldn't feel guilty about having suspicions. There's too many bad eggs out there.

But it's good to encounter a good fellow once in a while.
a very good man indeed... despite his difficult life... he still have a dignity... truely one good man.
your first instinct was to trust him and that shows a trusting and kind heart. the debate which followed in your head after that is not important. it's your street sense talking. *hugz*
but then again hor..i reckon it's better to have him do the job first then pay him...
Hi Jonzz,
Had some not too good experiences and I ranted and raved and then I forget all about it and I'd be my trusting self again. And ya, when I meet an honest chap such as this carwash fella, I feel very good.

Have a nice day, Jonzz.
Hi Monk[+]icon,
Thinking back, I have been taught life's many lessons not by someone of high-society standing but by the simple and humble man-in-the-street.

You have a great day.
Hi Mistipurple,
awww.....you are so kind...lemme give you a hug.

The 'debate'...it came about when I recall the many times I have been chided by my relatives and friends when I told them I was 'conned' into parting with some money. Their actual words, "Why so BODOH one???"

Ya, I admit I was 'BODOH' but only for a moment. I was enlightened that to some people, the end jusitfy the means, nevermind, if they have to submit to trickery. Sad, huh?

Have a good day, Mistipurple.
Hi laundryamah,
I paid him upfront for convenience sake...he need not wait for me and I need not go looking for him to pay.

Have a pleasant day.